Main Page > 1994 Wasting Away in Margaritaville >
Waking up covered with Checkers Wrappers and French Fry remnants, Mike and Bone foggily attempted to recount the night before. They remembered leaving Sloppy Joes'; they remembered going to Checkers; but neither remembered anything in between, which since they had been driving, that wasn't particularly good !! So before they checked out of the Best Western, they checked out a few Bed and Breakfast's much closer to Duval Street, for safer driving to the lovely local Bars (especially if you are on foot !!) They found a splendid little B&B called West Winds, which is on Elizabeth Street at Dumbarton, which is adjacent to the Key West Marina and three blocks north of Duval Street.
A Room with a Brew: Wonderful West Winds
Now that the boys were within walking distance, they checked out of the Best Western and grabbed some brews, and headed to the pool to sip on some suds. By the pool the boys relaxed and B.S'ed with any guest that came with in 20 yards of the boys and their beers.
On the rocks at Ft. Zachary Taylor State Park
The pool was awesome, but the boys had the azure blue Caribbean Ocean to check out. So they headed to the State Park on Key West named after the only President who died from eating pickles, Ft. Zachary Taylor. The so-called "beach" really wasn't, it was a very rocky shore line. After gingerly walking out in the water and swimming around for about an hour, a cloudburst, and a group of "happy", er gay fellows splashing about incented the boys to leave the beach and search for more heady, heterosexual surroundings, as well as an ice cold beer!
Flirtin' With Disaster at the Green Parrot
There is no better place on the Island to find a ice cold beer in the middle of the afternoon that the Green Parrot Bar. On the outskirts of a community in Key West known as the "Little Bahamas" (rife with weird black preachers in black suits and chickens running rampantly around), the Green Parrot was established in 1890 and is not a real tourist place, but a local neighborhood bar. Ordering a couple of Labatt Blues at the Bar, Mike and Bone and started dickering and flirting (very innocently!!) with the bartender, an attractive older woman probably in her 50's. As the boys dickered an older gentleman joined in the flirting, after about 15 minutes the newcomer let on that he was the Bartenders husband !!
A very Interesting Story. Pulling up next to the boys the man bought a round of beers and began to share he and his wife's very interesting life story. They were originally from the San Francisco Bay Area where Joe (the Husband) was a Vice-President for Sale in the Oldsmobile Division of General Motors. His job was to travel around to the Olds Dealers in the Bay Area and teach the Dealers on how to sell cars. He made great money but worked long hours and never had time for his family. Finally fed up with the inability to spend time with their young daughter, they changed their lifestyle. They sold everything they had, bought a boat and provisions, and started to sail around the world, fishing for food, and when needed putting into port (hence their stay in Key West) to work long enough to earn what they needed in order to head back out and home school their now teenaged daughter,,, living a very cool lifestyle.
Since the couple had gotten to known the Keys fairly well in the 4 months of being in the area, the boys asked where could they find a good beach to swim and party, the couple looked at each other and both said, Bahia Honda !! And that was enough for the boys, they bid a fond adieu to the eclectic couple and jumped in their little rental Honda Accord, and set off for the picturesque key known as Bahia Honda !!
Bahia Honda, Voted one of the top 5 beaches in the United States
(Until after Mike and Bones visit fouled it, where it dropped to 205)
A lagoon on par with Gilligan's Isle on Bahia Honda
Driving 45 minutes north US-1, the Boys went to the Bahia Honda State Park, and found beautiful, palm-lined beaches with white sand. Plundering the Hall of Shame, they took a few beers and went down to the beach for a swim and some suds.
Checking out US-1 from Bahia Honda
Flagler's Folly
Henry Flagler is a name synonymous with Miami, South Florida, an the Keys. Flagler made his fortune in the Standard Oil Company as a business partner of John D. Rockefeller, he opened up much of South Florida to tourism and commercial development. Flagler spent much of his fortune on developing a railroad from Miami to Key West. The Rail Road took years to build and much of it was destroyed in the Islamorada Hurricane of 1935 (which killed many WW I veterans.) The remnants of one of the sections of the railroad still looms over Bahia Honda.
Mike and Bone drinking a few beers, contemplating a 80 foot jump off of the Old Rail Section !
Mike and Bone carried a couple of icy cold brews up the hill onto the old Flagler Rail, and discussed football as the Sun began to set over the Keys.
Soaking up the Suds in the Fading Lights
The Last Brilliant Light in the Keys
Yo! Ma !!, Havin' Dinner at Mangrove Mama's !!!
All the driving, swimming, and beer worked up a big appetite, heading back to Key West the Boys were committed to finding a cool place along the way for dinner. About 10 miles out of Key West they came across a little restaurant called Bahama Mamas. The Restaurant's plastic Tiki lights let the Boys know check the place out!
Sidling up the bar the boys ordered a few margies and a menu. Just as the drinks arrived a fellow patron returned to his seat next to Bone's; a six foot eight bald Hells Angel Biker, complete with black leather, tattoos, and chains. The boys tensed up anticipating trouble until the Biker slapped Bone on the back and said "Boy you gotta try Jack's shrimp stir-fry,,,, its the best !!!!" Apparently the biker knew the owner of the Bar Jack, who always made custom dinners for the Biker (named Bill). Well Mike and Bone ordered the special shrimp stir-fry, and darn if the Biker wasn't right, the food was awesome !
So now sated, the boys were ready to restart their assault on Duval Street !!!
Partying on Duval Street: Part 2 Getting Ridiculous at Ricks Cafe
"That's a mime you dummy !!" Getting back to the West Winds, the boys parked their car and walked up Simonton Street to Duval, at that corner, there was a mime painted from head to toe in bright, shiny metallic paint. Standing on a similarly painted trash can (made to look like a pedestal) and a light shining up, he looked like a statue. Slowly moving, never saying a word the performance artist, cajoled cash out of the tourist pockets.
After about 10 minutes of watching the "dummy", Mike and Bone wandered down by Sloppy Joes, and started hitting the margies hard at Ricks, and outdoor bar right across the street from Sloppy Joes. By midnight the boys were in a pleasant, if not woozy state. From Ricks they started bar-hopping all the way down Duval to the Southern Most Motel, having at least one drink in very bar along the way. By 2:30 AM the boys were massively hammered, worn out, and realizing that they had to get up at 7:00AM in order to make the boat to go snorkeling ! So back they staggered to the West Winds for a "short nap."